Chapter One...The Beginning (So to speak...)

For most of us, we say the 'beginning' is when we were born. For me, well let's just say that it began 10 years ago. Lessons in life that you'd honestly believe wouldn't happen to you. For me, it did and seems to have an ongoing thing here. You might want to pay attention, there might be some key things that can help you or someone you know.

The life experience I'm getting ready to share with you is of one that happens all the time and some are too weak to know that there is something wrong with that picture. You know something is not right and you know something is wrong, but this can't be happening to you...no, not you. So you think, yet it is. I have endured a lifetime of pain, suffering, let-downs, disappointments and well just plain misery when I met this person. Please be prepared to be shocked and awed. None of what I am about to reveal I intentionally ever wanted to happen but it did and boy, did I learn from it.

~~And We're Off!!!!!~~

Scene set in sunny California, during the summer.  Pregnant and just broke up with the donater of this child I am carrying.  Sitting on my lovely velveteen sofa, playing on WebTv. (Don't think many of you will remember that...lol.)  It's hotter than the Devil's butt on a cool day, more like someone opened the doors to Hell and said it was okay to come out and play.  Here I am 4 months into my first pregnancy and the phone will not stop harassing me with it's, at times, annoying bells, letting me know that there is a possibility that on the other end, someone is trying to get my attention.  Either worth my time or not...at that point I really didn't care.   I just wished it would have stopped it's incessant ringing.  It kept cutting me off my WebTv!!!  Finally, after about an hour of putting a lot of energy to ignore the invention Mr. Bell came up with, I finally answered it.  It was my mother.
"I've been trying to get a hold of you for over an hour", she says with concern on her words, "Are you okay?"
"Yes, I thought you were someone else trying to get a hold of me.  I apologize. What's going on?"
She sighs a sigh of mixed emotions, relief and disappointment almost like I can hear her thoughts.  "Did you go to your appointment today?"
"Not yet, it's not until two o'clock."
"Well do you need a ride or anything?"
"No, I have money to catch the bus and if I need a ride, one of my friends will take me."
"Have you eaten yet?"  Now, mind you, this is her first grandchild and the news of my pregnancy was a whopper to deal with.  She was filled with excitement, worry, anticipation and so many emotions that ANY parent would go through that is expecting their first grandchild.  Considering almost a year before I was told by my doctor that I would not be able to have children, because of a life threatening cyst I had on my left ovary.  Yes, obviously it was removed because there I sat 4 months into my first pregnancy!
"Yes, I've eaten but I'm still hungry", as we both bellowed in laughter.
"Well, alright then, let me know if there is anything you need and I love you."
With our salutations we hung up the phone and continued on our personal way....

Fast forward >>>>>>>>>>
It was August of 1999, that I had decided that I would move and marry the man that I loved and believed loved me.  This is where you need to pay attention...in Chapter 2.